Basics of Love

“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” —Robert A. Heinlein

‘Love’ is a basic necessity in everyone’s life. Like we cannot live without food, water, and air similarly we cannot live without love. But what is Love? How we can define Love? Well, many people defined it differently, but I would like to define as-

“Love is a special feeling that one feels for his/her beloved. Talking about love mean selflessness, unconditional, and without expectation.”

Selfless means you love someone by removing yourself. When you were not there that means no expectations and no conditions applied and no obligations to your partner. Love is not a temporary feeling or emotion. Emotions and feelings can change sometimes daily but true unconditional love is everlasting. Their happiness will be the first priority for you and you able to see your complete world. Love is something when you point someone before yourself, it’s more than just a feeling. You are accepting your beloved ‘as it is’ means you love with all positives and negatives. If you love somebody, you will accept the person without making any changes.

“I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.” – Angelita Lim

Are love and relationship are same?

Well, mostly we are considering when you are in love, you are in a relationship. First of all, let us understand what a relationship is.In a relationship you will respect the partner, you care for your partner and mostly it is need-based. But since the expectation is still present and you are not acceptable as it is, it can’t be love. For example, most of marriage life is running with practical challenges where both partners live based on their needs. You can see the difference in starting days of married life and as time progresses things will eventually be changed. You could care for your partner, you just help and provide food or any item which is required to live. They feel they are in love but they often have some issues with their partner, it could be their nature or habits or anything. Most couples live together due to society or family pressure. So in relation love could exist but is not necessary. One can love without having in a relationship, we usually called one side love where mostly no expectations exist or completely unconditionally. I know many love exist where people have not met for years or any communication but still love to exist somewhere in their hearts and always pray for each other for their happiness.

Love is also sacrifices and adjustment that you do for your beloved. Love is not only about asking for pleasure but it is more about the ability to ‘give’. There is no self-seeking, the urge is to sacrifice, not my happiness is important but the happiness of my beloved is important.

Can we love someone without attachment?

When you love someone with a mere attachment that is happening around the world. But again that is not love. You can detach yourself and see if you still love even after detachment. That is true love. With attachment, you have so many expectations and conditions but when you are detached you are free and even in your freedom still, you love that is unconditional love. So practically try to detach yourself and see the impact.

Does time or distance matters for love?

Distance indeed doesn’t matter when the love is true. When you are in a love with someone you would want to be together 24*7, even a moment of separation weighs too heavy on the heart. But even in such a situation distance does not matter, so even for someone in India or Australia or the USA, it hardly matters if love is true. Even if you met once in 5 years or 10 years, love exists in the heart.

So distance and time don’t matter for unconditional love. You could miss and keep waiting for your time. But if someone saying that they are in love for 5-6 years and suddenly their priority got changed so please understand these are nothing but this is situational love and get rid of such people. This is because love is everlasting, never-ending, and keeps residing in the heart.

Guys, all these thoughts that generate over the year and my own experience about love. The experience could vary from person to person. The definition of love would remain the same as selfless, no condition applies, and no expectation. So anyone can feel love with anyone and this is absolutely fine if true love exists.